Halloween-a-Thon

Candy overload? Not us!

This has been the busiest Halloween season EVER. After going on approximately 1 billion trick-or-treating excursions, the children are hyped up on enough high fructose corn syrup to cause them to actually vibrate.

It all started with the Zoo Boo event at the Erie Zoo. Who can resist zoo animals coupled with candy?

Even Spiderman has use for a light saber.

The weather cooperated nicely, and held off raining until we were safely back in the car. We're not sure if Nolan will ever recover from receiving a toothbrush from the booth the dentist's office set up. Everyone knows that giving toothbrushes away for Halloween is just plain wrong.

A toothbrush?! Who let the dentists in?

After the Zoo Boo event, I was informed of a "Spooktacular" Halloween event at the new Children's Safety Village. I'm really glad we got there early, since only 200 people were expected and 4000 ended up attending. The early bird gets the Snickers bar!

Then Matt's class had a "reverse trick-or-treat" at the local nursing home- instead of receiving candy, they handed out artwork to the residents. Of course, the nurses decided to give the preschoolers candy on the way out the door. Sidenote: nurses give away awesome candy- full sized Reese's and Snickers. Yum! I have no pictures from that event, since I was at home preparing for the next event: Treat Street.

Cutest. Kids. Ever.

The next day, Nolan's preschool had its annual "Treat Street" event. Parents choose a room on the third floor of the church and decorate it. The kids go trick-or-treating in the hallway, and we enable their sugar-loving ways. Our door looked pretty awesome.

We rock.

The only negative about our door was that it led to the supply closet. We hunched in the dim light among all the Christmas decorations, feeling very conflicted. The Baby Jesus simply glared from His manger. Awkward.

Not My holiday.

Matthew's pre-K class had its Halloween party on Friday. Fifteen four year olds, assorted siblings, and sugar. Enough said.

The Monster Sugar Rush Mash.

Then, of course, there was the trick-or-treating at the local mall. Getting candy from scantily clad goth-women at Hot Topic was definitely a new experience. On the plus side, the kids did learn some new vocabulary: "fish net hose" and "lip ring." Thankfully, Victoria's Secret was not handing out candy.

Fish net hose not included.

The actual trick-or-treat event isn't until tomorrow. I'm pretty sure we'll have enough candy to open up our own Sweet Shoppe by then. If we're not all hospitalized for diabetic coma, that is.

I hear Hershey and Nestle calling my name. Time to raid the kid's treat bags have a little chocolate break. Peace out.

Bring on the Sister Wives

"Mommy, why do they have such a big car?"

Matt stared in envy at the large 15 passenger van parked at his preschool. I explained that they had a lot of children in their family, so they needed a large vehicle to carry everyone. I told him that if we had more children, we would also need a larger vehicle.

"Like, if we had FIVE children, we would need a big van?"

"Yes, Matt. If we had five kids, we would need a van."

He sat quietly for a long time. I thought the conversation was over, until we arrived at his classroom and he declared:

"But then you would have to get married FIVE TIMES!"

You know, a sister-wife might come in handy on laundry day...

Lost in Translation: At the Dinner Table

As we were sitting down to our lovely dinner of ribs and corn, Matthew was dancing in his chair. He had many tales to tell, because he had been on a long-awaited field trip. He couldn't wait to tell Daddy all about his adventures.

"Dad, Dad, Daddy, Da-a-a-a-ad. Guess what? Today we went to the Animal Cemetery!"

Dennis looked a bit surprised.

"An animal cemetery? I suppose that was... interesting."

Matt was gleeful.

"We saw LOTS of animals! It was so cool!"

I could see the confusion settling into Dennis's head. Four year old children and dead animals makes for a rather disturbing mental picture.

"You went to an animal cemetery? Really?"

Matt nodded solemnly and replied,

"Yes. The animal cemetery. It's where all the animals live."

I figured that the Mommy-Translation should come quickly, before the conversation took any strange turns to pet funerals or burial practices.

"Matt, I think you mean sanctuary. You went to the animal sanctuary today."

"That's right, Mom! The Audubon is a great animal cemetery. It has so many animals."

Glad we cleared that one up. Sigh...

The Enchanted Forest

The Bear Hunt

Matt's Pre-K class recently made bears for "B" week. The next day, the bears all went missing, and the children had to go on a bear hunt. The bears were found, but no one ever thought to ask why the bears went missing. I asked Matt what the bear had been doing when he disappeared, and Matt said, "Probably eating some berries."

After inspecting one of the bears in question, I think I know where the bears went.


It's all there. The dilated pupils, hallucinogenic colors, and vacant smile. Yes, folks, I think these bears were dabbling in something a little more serious than blackberries.

Mr. Bear: I think it's time for Rehab.